Different authors define emotional intelligence differently. The term was coined in the 1950s by none other than Abraham Maslow, as he noticed that people could build emotional strength and develop their ability to effectively handle and control emotions.
In the following years, the concept of emotional intelligence has been widely researched.
In one of the first EI models introduced by Peter Salovey and John Mayer, emotional intelligence was defined as “the ability to monitor one’s own and other people’s emotions, to discriminate between different emotions and label them appropriately, and to use emotional information to guide thinking and behavior”.
It has later been refined and popularized by science journalist and New York Times bestseller writer Dr Daniel Goleman. Goleman described emotional intelligence as a “person’s ability to manage his feelings so that those feelings are expressed appropriately and effectively”.
Now, let’s take a look at some signs that indicate high emotional quotient!
Yes, all people experience emotions. All the time. But how many people are able to specify what they are feeling? To master your emotions first you have to address them. And not in a simple way such as “I feel good” or “I feel bad”.
Everyone knows whether they feel good or bad, but according to Dr. Travis Bradberry’s research, only 36% of people can label their emotions correctly. This requires a good “emotional vocabulary”. Those with high EQ have mastered their emotions because they understood them in the first place.
Imagine a person wondering why they might feel bad. It’s a tough question to answer because “feeling bad” is a pretty broad term. Without pinpointing the exact cause, a person can’t react and make the bad feeling go away and how could he?
On the contrary, an emotionally intelligent people would describe themselves as “angry”, “lonely”, “melancholic”, “frustrated” etc.
Naturally, after doing so, they are able to quickly get over their issues and deal with negative emotions!
Those who have interviewed for jobs are probably annoyed by the infamous question – what are your greatest strengths and biggest weaknesses?
But did you know it’s not accidental that this question is so popular?
In the late 1990s Johnson & Johnson’s Consumer Companies (JJCC) funded a study which concluded that there was a “strong relationship between superior performing leaders and emotional competence, supporting theorist’s suggestions that the social, emotional and relational competency set commonly referred to as Emotional Intelligence, is a distinguishing factor in leadership performance”.
So emotionally intelligent people don’t simply understand emotions, they also know what they are great at as well as areas in which they’re terrible! Additionally, by knowing themselves, they are able to identify what kind of behaviors from their surroundings evoke positive and negative emotions.
This allows them to fully utilize their strengths and leverage various situations, but also remain calm during hardships by understanding weaknesses.
Have you made your personal S/W list?
Think about it… You are in touch of who you are, you know what you’re good at and have accepted your weak points… What should someone say or do to offend you?
Emotionally intelligent people are pretty self-confident and open-minded and as such they are able to accept criticism with their hands wide open. They will also often joke on their own account.
High EQ individuals do not seek approval from their surroundings because they have already proven themselves to… themselves. Similarly, they are aware of things they need improvement on. As a result, they have pretty “thick skin!”
Additionally, holding a grudge doesn’t go together with high emotional intelligence.
Negative emotions that come with holding onto a grudge bring something much worse along. They bring stress. And emotionally intelligent people are well aware of that. In fact, researchers at Emory University have proven that holding onto stress contributes to high blood pressure and heart disease!
Everyone makes mistakes and nobody is perfect. High EQ individuals never seek perfection because it doesn’t exist. Instead, they work on themselves trying to do the best they can in a given situation.
When it comes to mistakes in particular, distancing yourself but remembering them is golden.
There is no use in crying over spilled milk. Dwelling too long on past mistakes evokes countless of negative emotions that are not helping you in the present. No use in feeling anxious over something that has already happened, right?
On the other hand, completely forgetting what you’ve done wrong will probably bind you to making the same mistake again!
By walking a thin rope between dwelling on past and forgetting it completely emotionally intelligent people learn from their mistakes and hardly ever repeat them again, while staying emotionally present and clear-minded!
Taking a time off the network and treating yourself with some me-time helps you keep stress level in check and live in the moment! People often neglect that, especially nowadays…
By making yourself available 24/7, you expose yourself to so many external stress factors that you could never control. Turning off your phone gives your body and mind some time to recuperate. Workaholics out there should pay special attention to this!
When is the last time you turned off your phone for a few hours?
Unlike IQ which is something we’re born with, our EQ can change if we are willing to work on it!
By practicing emotionally intelligent behaviors we allow our brain to create new patterns and unique pathways that later lead to creating habits.
Eventually, our brain will get used to these new habits and emotionally intelligent behaviors which will make old, destructive ones vanish. With enough practice, we can respond to our surroundings and situations with high emotional intelligence without even having to register it consciously!
Cookie | Duration | Description |
---|---|---|
cookielawinfo-checbox-analytics | 11 months | This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". |
cookielawinfo-checbox-functional | 11 months | The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". |
cookielawinfo-checbox-others | 11 months | This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other. |
cookielawinfo-checkbox-advertisement | 1 year | The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Advertisement". |
cookielawinfo-checkbox-necessary | 11 months | This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary". |
cookielawinfo-checkbox-performance | 11 months | This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". |
crumb | This cookie is set by websites that uses SquareSpace platform. The cookie is used to prevent cross-site request forgery (CSRF). | |
elementor | never | This cookie is used by the website's WordPress theme. It allows the website owner to implement or change the website's content in real-time. |
gdpr_status | 6 months 2 days | This cookie is set by the provider Media.net. This cookie is used to check the status whether the user has accepted the cookie consent box. It also helps in not showing the cookie consent box upon re-entry to the website. |
viewed_cookie_policy | 11 months | The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. It does not store any personal data. |
XSRF-TOKEN | session | The cookie is set by Wix website building platform on Wix website. The cookie is used for security purposes. |
Cookie | Duration | Description |
---|---|---|
__gads | 1 year 24 days | This cookie is set by Google and stored under the name dounleclick.com. This cookie is used to track how many times users see a particular advert which helps in measuring the success of the campaign and calculate the revenue generated by the campaign. These cookies can only be read from the domain that it is set on so it will not track any data while browsing through another sites. |
_ga | 2 years | This cookie is installed by Google Analytics. The cookie is used to calculate visitor, session, campaign data and keep track of site usage for the site's analytics report. The cookies store information anonymously and assign a randomly generated number to identify unique visitors. |
_ga_XZV5DHF9VD | 2 years | This cookie is installed by Google Analytics. |
_gat_gtag_UA_71463705_9 | 1 minute | This cookie is set by Google and is used to distinguish users. |
_gat_UA-71463705-9 | 1 minute | This is a pattern type cookie set by Google Analytics, where the pattern element on the name contains the unique identity number of the account or website it relates to. It appears to be a variation of the _gat cookie which is used to limit the amount of data recorded by Google on high traffic volume websites. |
_gcl_au | 3 months | This cookie is used by Google Analytics to understand user interaction with the website. |
_gid | 1 day | This cookie is installed by Google Analytics. The cookie is used to store information of how visitors use a website and helps in creating an analytics report of how the website is doing. The data collected including the number visitors, the source where they have come from, and the pages visted in an anonymous form. |
CONSENT | 16 years 5 months 20 days 12 hours | These cookies are set via embedded youtube-videos. They register anonymous statistical data on for example how many times the video is displayed and what settings are used for playback.No sensitive data is collected unless you log in to your google account, in that case your choices are linked with your account, for example if you click “like” on a video. |
session_depth | 30 minutes | This cookie is used to store the number of pages a vistor visits in a session on the website. |
Cookie | Duration | Description |
---|---|---|
_fbp | 3 months | This cookie is set by Facebook to deliver advertisement when they are on Facebook or a digital platform powered by Facebook advertising after visiting this website. |
B | 1 year | This Cookie is used by Yahoo to provide ads, contents or analytics. |
DSID | 1 hour | This cookie is setup by doubleclick.net. This cookie is used by Google to make advertising more engaging to users and are stored under doubleclick.net. It contains an encrypted unique ID. |
fr | 3 months | The cookie is set by Facebook to show relevant advertisments to the users and measure and improve the advertisements. The cookie also tracks the behavior of the user across the web on sites that have Facebook pixel or Facebook social plugin. |
id | 1 year | The main purpose of this cookie is targeting and advertising. It is used to create a profile of the user's interest and to show relevant ads on their site. This Cookie is set by DoubleClick which is owned by Google. |
IDE | 1 year 24 days | Used by Google DoubleClick and stores information about how the user uses the website and any other advertisement before visiting the website. This is used to present users with ads that are relevant to them according to the user profile. |
test_cookie | 15 minutes | This cookie is set by doubleclick.net. The purpose of the cookie is to determine if the user's browser supports cookies. |
uuid2 | 3 months | This cookies is set by AppNexus. The cookies stores information that helps in distinguishing between devices and browsers. This information us used to select advertisements served by the platform and assess the performance of the advertisement and attribute payment for those advertisements. |
VISITOR_INFO1_LIVE | 5 months 27 days | This cookie is set by Youtube. Used to track the information of the embedded YouTube videos on a website. |
YSC | session | This cookies is set by Youtube and is used to track the views of embedded videos. |
Cookie | Duration | Description |
---|---|---|
__ib2pgses_1186_a | session | No description |
__ib2pgses_1198_a | session | No description |
__ib2pgses_1221_a | session | No description |
__ib2pgses_1253_a | session | No description |
__ib2pgses_1283_a | session | No description |
__ib2pgses_1476_a | session | No description |
__ib2vid | 1 month | No description available. |
_app_session | 1 month | No description available. |
_gfpc | session | No description available. |
A3 | 1 year | No description |
akacd_widgets_routing | past | No description available. |
ans3 | 2 days | No description |
check | 1 day | No description available. |
GoogleAdServingTest | session | No description |
L-y13n2 | 1 day | No description |
outbrain_cid_fetch | 5 minutes | No description available. |
owner_token | 1 day | No description available. |
PP-y13n2 | 1 hour | No description |
r | 7 days | No description |
recs_3e571bd1fd579a0c57cc16aa155ba54b | past | No description |
RL-y13n2 | 1 day | No description |
thirdparty | 1 hour | No description available. |
yt-remote-connected-devices | never | No description available. |
yt-remote-device-id | never | No description available. |